It has been years since I have been insulted whether a small one or a big one. And it is ironic how the mot painful ones come from people I care about the most. In the past I would have just taken it, kept in inside like a poison, and let it out explosively once in a while when everything got too heavy to bear. But now, I don't even try to care, feelings I do not like I just ignore. There is no acknowledgement and therefore no apology. Which is a better reaction...? Or are both a sign of immaturity and that I have yet to find a perfect way of expressing my feelings.
People say to let out these emotions with an outlet of some kind that they feel comfortable in. For me that is dance. In these few weeks when I took it up again, my soul has never felt so light in years. To some of my friends it may seem as if I am just willful, trying to distract myself from my studies and taking a too long break from design. But I took a great deal of courage for me to even step back inside a dance studio. Fear of not being good enough to dance with others, or that my outfit was not 'dance' enough were my greatest obstacles I had to overcome slowly. But overcome them I have. And I do not take pleasure in comments from other people who do not understand how this had been a personal big step on my part. Of course I would feel indignant when you question my attempt at trying to right my confused emotional state. No pointing of fingers because this is as much an personal problem as it is an external one. It is said the quietest people are those who perceive the most ~ How painfully true.
Other than that, this Saturday was amazing! OneOkRock's concert was just mind blowing!! All of the members where so energetic and gave their all for the concert it was so touching ^^ The best part was when they played my favourite song from their very first album!! That made me sooooooo happy I can't even~!! Nothing beats a real live performance... ... Except when there is a 6 foot tall guy blocking your view zzz. Ah well, it was amazing nonetheless. Surprise surprise i didn't have any muscle ache form all the jumping and waving of the arms haha. No sore throat either~ Can't wait for them to perform again in Singapore^^
Sigh~ I really have to stop peeling my nail polish off my nails, its pulling thin pieces of the nail itself off
I should probably concentrate on my work now, Ciao!
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